#21
What did the answering machine say to the

telephone?
Take my word for it.
#22
How is a telephone like a dirty bathtub?

They both have rings!
#23
Why did the chicken walk on the telephone
wire?
She wanted to lay it on the line!
#24
How do, like, really laid-back types answer
the phone?
Mellow.
#25
How do scaredy-cats answer the phone?

Yellow?
#26
What do you get if you cross a telephone
with a
night crawler?
Ringworm!
#27
What do you get if you cross a telephone

with a fat football player?
A wide receiver.
#28
Caller: My goodness, Operator! Your nose is
so
stuffed up, I can't understand you. You should really take
something for
that cold.
Operator: Good idea. I'll take the rest
of the day off!
#29
What animals talk on the telephone the most?

The yakety-yaks!
#30
What do
you get if you cross a phone
with a rooster?
A wake-up call!
#31
Hello, police? Please send an officer over
to 324 London Road
right away!
Sorry, this isn't the police
station. It's the Delicatessen.
Oh. Well, in that case, please send
over a pastrami sandwich!
#32
Caller: Operator! Operator! I don't know

what's wrong with my phone, but I can't make long distance calls
any
longer!
Operator: Don't worry. Your long distance calls are
long enough
already!
#33
Caller: Operator! Operator! Call me an

ambulance!
Operator: Okay. You're an ambulance!
#34
Party Host: Hello?
Phone Caller: I'm
trying to reach a Ms. Nidiot. Her first name is Ima.
Could you please
ask if anybody at your party knows her?
Party Host: I'd be glad
to. Please hold on. (shouts) Excuse me, but
does anybody know Ima
Nidiot?
#35
How can you tell if a bee is on the phone?

You get a buzzy signal.
#36
What do you get when you cross a telephone
with a pair of
pants?
Bell-bottoms!
#37
Caller: Operator! Operator! Do you know my

boyfriend's line has been busy for an hour?
Operator: No, but
if you hum a few bars, I might be able to sing along
with you.
#38
When doesn't a telephone work

underwater?
When it's wringing wet!
#39
What do you get if you cross a pig and a
telephone ?
A lot of crackling on the line !
#40
What do you get if you cross a telephone

and a marriage bureau ?
A wedding ring !