#1
Who do they get for Babe the pig's dangerous
movie scenes?
A stunt ham.
#2
The teacher was furious with her son. "Just
because
you've been put in my class, there's no need to think you can
take
liberties. You're a pig." The boy said nothing. "Well! Do you
know
what a pig is?" "Yes, Mom," said the boy. "The offspring of a

swine."
#3
What do you get when you cross a pig with a billy

goat?
A crashing bore.
#4
Why do pigs never recover from illness ?

Because you have to kill them before you cure them !
#5
What kind of tie does a pig wear ?
Pig's tie
!
#6
What do you get if you cross pigs with a lot of
grapes
?
A swine gut !
#7
What did the pig call a manuscript?
A shoat
story.
#8
What famous pig actor made a movie about

Frankenswine?
Boaris Karloff.
#9
Why did the pig send his story to New
York?

He wanted to be published on Pork Avenue.
#10
Why was the pig happy when reviewers criticized
his
story?
Because they called it garbage.
#11
What are the pigs warned to look out for in New

York?
Pigpockets.
#12
What did the pig say
when he found a line of
ants in his trough?
"Mmm. Canapes."
#13
Why wouldn't the sow let her piglets play with

toads?
She didn't want them to grow into wart hogs.
#14
Why wouldn't the
piglet's mother let her
read romantic novels?
She was afraid her daughter would run away with
a wolf.
#15
Why wouldn't the bird
let her chicks go near
the pig pen?
She didn't want the pigs eating shredded tweet.
#16
Why won't the witch
let the traveling pig
actors into her gingerbread cottage?
She's afraid they'll bring down
the house.
#17
Why won't pigs take up
jogging?
They
don't like to get that far from the table.
#18
Why should you never invite a pig to join your

tug-of-war team?
Pigs want to be pulled through the mudhole.
#19
Why isn't there a Superpig?
It's too hard
for a pig to change clothes in a telephone booth.
#20
Why is your dad chasing those
pigs through the
garden?
We're raising mashed potatoes.