What's brown and furry on the inside and
clear on the
King Kong in clingfilm
Who is the smelliest, hairiest monarch in

the world?
King Pong.
What do you get if you cross King Kong with
A terrified postman.
What is as big as King Kong but doesn't
weigh anything?
King Kong's shadow.
If King Kong went to Hong Kong to play

ping-gong and died, what would they put on his coffin?
A lid.
How can you mend King Kong's arm if he's
twisted it?
With a monkey wrench.
What's big and hairy and climbs up the

Empire State Building in a dress?
Queen Kong.
What do you get if you cross King Kong with

a giant frog?
A monster that climbs up the Empire State Building
and catches
aeroplanes with its tongue.
What happened when King Kong swallowed Big

He found time-consuming.
What do you do if King Kong sits in
of you at the cinema?
Miss most of the film!
Why did King Kong join the army?
To learn
about gorilla warfare.
After being away on business, Tim thought it

would be nice to bring his wife a little gift.

"How about
some perfume?" he asked the cosmetics clerk.

She showed him a
bottle costing $50.00.

"That's a bit much," said Tim, so she
returned with a smaller bottle
for $30.00.

"That's still quite a
bit," Tim complained.

Growing annoyed, the clerk brought out a
tiny $15.00 bottle.

"What I mean," said Tim, "is I'd like to see
something really

The clerk handed him a mirror.