Q. Why did the ape run around with a piece

of raw meat on his head?
A. He thought he was a gorilla.
Q: Why do gorillas have big nostrils?
They have big fingers.
A gorilla was
walking through the jungle
when he came across a deer eating grass in a
clearing. The gorilla
roared, 'Who is the king of the jungle?'and the deer
'Oh, you are, Master.'

The gorilla walked off pleased. Soon he
came across a zebra drinking at
a water hole. The gorilla roared,
'Who is the king of the jungle?'
and the zebra replied, 'Oh, you
are, Master.'

The gorilla walked off pleased. Then he came across
an elephant. 'Who
is the king of the jungle?' he roared.

With that, the elephant threw the gorilla across a tree and jumped on

him. The gorilla scraped himself up off the ground and said, 'Okay,

okay, there's no need to get mad just because you don't know the

Why do primates do so
well in show
Put any Ape in the spotlight - and monkeyshines!
Why should you always refuse to lend an Ape

It's dangerous to let him put the bite on you!
Why do waiters
like Gorillas better than
Did you ever hear a customer complain 'Waiter, there's a
Gorilla in
my soup!'
Why do the Gorillas
like Jimmy
They don't really know - but they're NUTS about him!
Why do Apes
love to go to school in bad
They like any jungle - even a blackboard jungle!
Why do Apes like tall buildings?
They want
to climb the heights of the business world!
Why do apes climb to the tops of
The elevator men are on strike!
Why did the Gorilla visit Italy?
advertisement's headline enticed him - See Ape-les and die!
Why did the Gorilla fail English?
He had
little Ape-titude!
Why did the
Gorilla enlist in the ragged
continental army?
To avoid the draft!
Why did the
girl Gorilla, engaged to the
invisible man, call off the wedding?
Because in the last analysis she
just couldn't see it!
Why did the Ape jump off the building?
wanted to show the world the stuff he was made of!
Why did the
actor fire his Gorilla
The big Ape kept wanting to take more than a 10% bite!
Why did both Germany and the U.S
want to
hire Apes during World War Two?
Because they are excellent at waging
Gorilla warfare!
Why couldn't the Gorilla pitcher
make it
in the major leagues?
His balk was worse than his bite!
Why are Gorillas underpaid?
willing to work peanuts!
Who is the Gorillas' favourite President of

recent years?
Hairy Truman!