Why do penguins eat fish?
Because donuts
get soggy before they can catch them.
Why are sardines the stupidest fish in the sea
Because they climb into tins, close the lid and leave teh key
What did the sardine call the
submarine ?

A can of people !
Why is a fish easy to weigh ?
Because it
has its own scales !
What did the boy fish say to his girlfriend ?

'Your plaice or mine' !
Who sleeps at the bottom of the sea ?
the kipper !
What is dry on the outside, filled with water
blows up buildings ?
A fish tank !
What fish do road-menders use ?
krill !
What do you call a literary fish?
What part of a fish weighs the most ?

It's scales !
What TV game show do fish like best?
that tuna!
Two parrots are sitting on a perch. The

first one says to the other "can you smell fish?".
What do you get if you cross a salmon, a
bird's leg
and a hand ?
Birdsthigh fish fingers !
What kind of money
do fishermen make ?

Net profits !
What bit of fish doesn't make sense ?
piece of cod that passeth all understanding !
Which fish go to heaven when they die ?

Angelfish !
Why are fish so smart?
They are always in
What do you call a fish with no eyes ?

Fish !
How do fish go into business ?
The start
on a small scale !
When fish play football, who
is the
captain ?
The team's kipper !