A bus filled with politicians was
countryside one day, on the campaign trail. The bus
caught up in the beautiful scenery, loses control and
into the ditch.
A farmer living nearby hears the horrible crash
rushes out to discover the wreckage. Finding the
he buries them.
The next day, the police come to the farm to
man. "So you buried all the politicians?" asked the
officer. "Were they all dead?"
The farmer answered, "Some
said they weren't, but you
know how politicians lie."
Last summer, the President and Mrs. Clinton
were vacationing in their home state of Arkansas. On a venture one
they stopped at a service station to fill up the car with gas.
seemed that the owner of the station was once Hillary's high
They exchanged hellos, and went on their way.
As they were driving on to their destination, Bill put his arm around
Hillary and said, "Well, honey, if you had stayed with him, you
be the wife of a service station owner today."
smirked and replied, "No, if I had stayed with him, he would be
President of the United States."
Q: What's Clinton doing to
A: If you've paid your tax bill and have enough money left
your family--you're happy.
Former Vice President Quayle, Speaker of the
Gingrich, and President Clinton are traveling in a
together in Kansas. A tornado comes along and
whirls them up into the
air and tosses them thousands
of yards away. They all fall into a
When they come to and extract themselves from
vehicle, they realize they're in the fabled Land of Oz.
to go see the famous Wizard of Oz. The
Wizard is known for granting
people their wishes.
Quayle says, "I'm going to ask the Wizard
for a brain."
Gingrich responds, "I'm going to ask the Wizard for
Clinton speaks up, "Where's Dorothy?"
Q: How can you identify a
has been in use at the Clinton White House?
A: There is White-out on
Q: Why aren't Clinton White House staffers
A: It takes too long to retrain them.
Why is Chelsea Clinton growing up a
Because dad can't keep his pants on and mom wants to
Q: Why were the
Clintonites pushing the
A: Because they could spell it.
President Clinton to maid: Mam, can you do
something about Hillary's room.
She complains that it's the
ugliest room in the White House. Maid:
remove the mirrors right away.
Q: How is Clinton's
health care reform a
lot like his haircut?
A: It is a lot more expensive than it
Q: Why did the
IRS recently audit Bill
A: Because he filed as head of the household.
Q: What is the difference between Bill Clinton
A: Elvis was drafted and served proudly in the
Q: What does Bill Clinton
have in common
with former great Presidents?
A: Absolutely nothing.
Q: When did Clinton's friends become sure
he had political ambitions?
A: When he married outside of his
Q. What do you
get when you cross a
politician with a dishonest lawyer?
A. Chelsea Clinton
Q: Why did Clinton waffle on military
action in Bosnia?
A: His area of expertise is dodging armed conflict.
Q: What has Clinton done that no one has
been able to do in the last 5 years?
A: Unite the Republican
Q: What is the first thing that President
says after waking up?
A: "Good morning, Bill."
If Ted Kennedy, Dan Quayle, Bob Packwood
Bill Clinton all had a spelling contest, which one
Dan Quayle. He's the only one who knows that
harass is one
One day there
were these three boys
the street, all of a sudden they heard a yell: 'HELP!
When the boys got to the noise they saw Bill
Clinton in a
lake drowning. The three boys saved
him from drowning. Bill Clinton
asks the first
boy how he could ever repay him. The boy said,
want a boat.'
The second boy said 'I want a truck.'
third boy said, 'I want three tombstones with are
names all on
them.' Bill Clinton said, 'why is that son?'
The little boy said,
'because when my Dad finds out that we
saved you, he is going to kill