"Doctor," said the
patient, "I need help! I
can't stop acting like a cat!"
"How long have you had this problem?"
the doctor asked.
"Lest's see," said the patient, "Mom had the
litter in '41
When you call a dog, they usually come to

When you call a cat; they take a message.
Q: Why couldn't the cat speak?

A: The dog
taped his mouth.
If a cat won an Oscar, what would he get?
a-cat-emy award.
Why was the cat afraid of the tree?

of the tree bark.
A guy walks into a laundry run by cats. "Excuse

me", he said to
the cat in charge, "Can you get milk stains out?"
"Sure," replied
the cat. "We'll have that stain licked in a
What is an octopus?
An eight-sided cat.
What do cat actors say on stage ?
Tabby or not
tabby !
What is another way to describe
a cat ?
heat seeking missile !
Why was the cat so small ?
Because it only ate
condensed milk !
When the cat's away.....?
The house smells
better !
Which big cat should
you never play cards with
A cheetah !
Teacher: Name four members of the cat
Pupil: Daddy cat, mummy cat and two kittens !
Why are black cats such good singers?
very mewsical.
What do you call a black cat than can spring up to

a six foot wall ?
A good jumpurr !
What is a black cat's favourite TV show
Miami Mice !
What's furry, has whiskers and
chases outlaws
A posse cat !
What did the black cat say
to the fish
I've got a bone to pick with you !
Why do black cats never shave ?
Because 8 out
of 10 cats prefer whiskas !
When is it unlucky to see a black cat ?
your a mouse !