#41
How do you know accountants have no
imagination?
They named a firm PricewaterhouseCoopers.
#42
What does it mean when an accountant is
drooling out of
both sides of his mouth?
His desk is level
#43
What do accountants suffer from that

ordinary people don't?
Depreciation.
#44
Conversation between two accountants at a

cocktail party:
".......and ninthly..."
#45
The accountant's prayer: Lord, help me be
more
relaxed about insignificant details, starting tomorrow at
10.53:16 am,
Eastern Daylight Saving Time.
#46
What does an accountant say when
you ask
him the time?
It's 9.18 am and 12 seconds; no wait - 13 seconds, no
wait - 14
seconds, no wait......
#47
What's the most wicked thing a
group of
young accountants can do?
Go into town and gang-audit someone.
#48
What's the most wicked thing a group of
young accountants
can do?
Go into town and gang-audit someone.
#49
How do you drive an accountant completely

insane?
Tie him to a chair, stand in front of him and fold up a
road map the
wrong way.
#50
What's an accountant's idea of trashing
his hotel room?
Refusing to fill out the guest comment card.
#51
What's the definition of unlikely?
A
photo-spread in Playboy titled 'The World's Top Accountants -

Nude!'.
#52
What do you call an accountant who is seen
talking to someone?
Popular
#53
What's an extroverted accountant?
One
who looks at your shoes while he's talking to you instead of his

own.
#54
What does an accountant use for birth

control?
His personality.
#55
What do actuaries do to liven up
their
office party?
Invite an accountant.
#56
Why do some accountants
decide to become
actuaries?
They find bookkeeping too exciting.
#57
What's an actuary?
An accountant without
the sense of humour.
#58
Why did God invent economists?
So
accountants could have someone to laugh at.
#59
When does a person decide to become an

accountant?
When he realises he doesn't have the charisma to succeed
as an
undertaker.
#60
What's the definition of a good tax
accountant?
Someone who has a loophole named after him.