#1
Did you hear about the household appliance
that eats ants and records
TV shows?
It's the VCRdvard
#2
Which aardvark holds the speed record?
The
nearsighted aardvark, who wrapped his tongue around a

motorcycle!
#3
How do
you define an aardvark?
Aan
aanimal that resembles an aanteater!
#4
A man wanted a new aardvark so he looked

through the classified ads. He phoned a number he found and an elderly

lady answered.
"How much are your aardvarks?" he asked.

"They're L6 each," came the reply.
"Did you raise them yourself?"
inquired the man.
"Oh yes," she said, "Yesterday they were only L5
each."
#5
What has six legs, two arms, four eyes and a

tail?
A man holding an aardvark.
#6
I've got a new
aardvark. Would you like
to play with him? I don't really know. I've
heard it growling, it
doesn't sound very friendly. Does it bite? That's
what I want to
find out.
#7
Two aardvarks watched in amazement as a

firework flashed across the sky.
1st aardvark: Wow! I wish I could
fly like that.
2nd aardvark: You would, if your tail was on fire.
#8
Who is the Lone Aardvark's faithful Indian

companion?
Tanto
#9
Who has a long nose, wears a mask, and sits
tall in the
saddle?
The Lone Aardvark!
#10
What do you call a Polish aardvark?
A
Polaark!
#11
What did the
impatient waiter ask the
gluttonous aardvark?
Is that your final ant, sir!
#12
How many aardvarks can ride on an
elephant?
Six... three on the back and three in the trunk!
#13
What do you call an aardvark that's good at
golf?
A paredvark!
#14
What do you call an aardvark astronaut?
A
starredvark!
#15
What do you call an road construction
aardvark?
A tarredvark!
#16
What do you call a three-footed aardvark?
A
yardvark!
#17
Why do aardvarks make undesirable
neighbors?
Because they always have their noses in other people's

business!
#18
When is an aardvark jumpy?
When he's got
ants in his pants!
#19
Why does mama aardvark call her husband a
cannibal?
Because he ate his ant for dinner!
#20
Who won the animal race?
The giraffe and
the aardvark were running neck and neck, but the
aardvark won by a
nose!